TOWIE Series 3, Episode 3: “Let’s Put The Guns Down First”

The Only Way Is Essex continued on Sunday night, with another instalment of drama, awkward encounters and yet another outrageous outfit from Joey. Ah, Joey – he’s the gift that keeps on giving.  This week, the gang are off paintballing for Other Lauren’s birthday, and Joey thinks a jacket over his bare chest, some tiny […]

The Only Way Is Essex continued on Sunday night, with another instalment of drama, awkward encounters and yet another outrageous outfit from Joey.

Ah, Joey – he’s the gift that keeps on giving.  This week, the gang are off paintballing for Other Lauren’s birthday, and Joey thinks a jacket over his bare chest, some tiny shorts and a rather jaunty hat are suitable attire!

Luckily his sister persuades him otherwise, but is unable to change the Essex lad’s mind about moving out. Joey living on his own? Oh dear, we can only imagine the trouble he’d get in to! As it is, big sis Frankie had to explain what a TV license is!

Control-freak Mario runs in to Mark at the gym, and they have a talk about Lucy, while both trying to look as macho as possible. To sum up a fairly long and pointless exchange, Mario has banned Lucy from talking to Mark and his family – Mark doesn’t really seem to care.

He has, however, given up on his 14-day celibacy vow (surprise surprise) after a chat with his dad, Mark Sr. Yes; the entire Wright family has now made it on to the show. Mark Sr. actually scared us a tad with his no nonsense chat! Still, after 8 years of hearing your son banging on about the same girl, it would be hard to remain sympathetic!

Lauren meanwhile, is fast becoming redundant and currently adds little to the show, bar hanging around with Other Lauren and Maria.

Maria is doing the opposite, and continues her bid to become more than just an extra by agreeing to go for a drink with Mick, much to the horror of Kirk – “the word sugar-daddy springs to mind”.

To be fair to her, Maria does attempt to clear the air during paintballing – perhaps not the best time to tell someone only a couple of years younger than you, that you want to date their dad? “Let’s put the guns down first” says Maria… proving she’s slightly cleverer than she looks.

What is Mick thinking anyway? He seems to spend his time perving over his son’s friends, and hanging around them at various events… does he not know anyone his own age?

Arg and Lydia were largely absent in this episode. We saw Arg take on his first day at a hospital radio station – in a quest to fulfil his dream of becoming a radio DJ, while Lydia went to visit Mr. Darcy at the farm. Uneventful.

“Majorly awkward but hilarious moment” of the episode occurs when Lucy tries on some lingerie for Jess, who is opening an underwear shop. (Yes! Yet ANOTHER of the TOWIE girls is opening a shop!)

Jess conveniently “pops out” to “get something” when in walks brother Mark, catching Lucy modelling some rather skimpy underwear. She shrieks and grabs a cushion, he smirks and says: “you’re looking smoking by the way” before walking out. Totes cringe, totes amazing!

So there you have it! You’re up to date bingo-lovers! Stay tuned for all the latest!

The Bachelor UK Episode 3: “I hate the fact I’m attracted to you”

The Bachelor continued on Channel 5 this weekend, and it started with a twist – Two girls, one rose. Yes, Carianne and Danielle went head-to-head at a wine-tasting session with Gav – while the girl who impressed him the most would receive a rose, the other would be sent home. Tense! Carianne did what she […]

The Bachelor continued on Channel 5 this weekend, and it started with a twist – Two girls, one rose. Yes, Carianne and Danielle went head-to-head at a wine-tasting session with Gav – while the girl who impressed him the most would receive a rose, the other would be sent home. Tense!

Carianne did what she does best, and got her claws out: “I think I’ve got the upper hand in looks and body.” She said. Perhaps, Carianne, but do you have the personality?

Danielle – who has been very quiet thus far – had an air of desperation. When she wasn’t talking nineteen to the dozen, or agreeing with everything Gavin said, she was slating her rivals in the competition. Come on Danielle, everyone knows you shouldn’t talk about other girls while on a date!

It seems Gavin agreed. Despite seeming a bit put off by Carianne’s statements about glamour modelling ( “What other job can you do where you work for an hour and get £500 pounds?” – Erm, we can think of one!) Gavin presented her with the single rose, and sent Danielle home.

Gav and Carianne then headed off for a romantic picnic – cue majorly cringe-worthy moment, as the squeaky blonde goes in for a kiss before Gav’s even opened the wine. Calm down girl! Still, she is the first girl to get a full-on snog from the bachelor, so she must be doing something right!

Back at the house Carrie is still rabbiting on about her “deep, deep feelings” to anyone who will listen, and it seems Scary Laura’s fallen under the charms of the bachelor too – “I really want to kiss him” she giggles. Better get in line, Laura!

A whole lot more is revealed in a steamy burlesque themed date. Gavin claims that he wants to get to know the quieter girls in the competition – “Confidence is such an attractive quality – this will show if they have it” he says. Yeah right! We know your game, Mr. Henson – you just want to see the girls in their underwear!

He gets his wish, as Layla, Georgie, Keshia, April, and Angharad get dolled up in revealing outfits and take to the stage – strutting their stuff in front of the bachelor – burlesque style!

We have to hand it to Gavin, he managed to keep it together in the face of all those boobs and bums, but did spend most of the time with his mouth hanging open! April in particular looked the picture of confidence – despite her self-esteem issues – and was rewarded with a rose, keeping her in the competition.

Things took a dramatic turn during the final date, as a revealing game of truth or dare – based on the spinning of a roulette wheel, had the girls confessing saucy secrets. All of the girls except Zivile, that is. Yes, Zivile still hasn’t got round to telling Gav she’s a virgin – and wasn’t about to do so in front of all her competition! That is one conversation we can’t wait to see.

Meanwhile, Nickie shakes her bum (it is a good bum) a cute welsh bartender serves everyone Welsh themed cocktails, and Laura tries – and fails – to appear normal. “I hate the fact I’m attracted to you.” Gav tells her. Ahhh, just what every girl wants to hear!

As the rose ceremony draws closer, there’s another shock twist – remember the cute welsh bartender from the ‘Truth or Dare’ date? Well, it turns out he’s actually Jamie – Gav’s best friend from school! Uh-oh, those ladies better watch out, every girl knows the real way to a man’s heart is through his friends.

Jamie gatecrashes the pre-rose ceremony cocktail party, and interrogates the girls – before filling Gavin in on what he’s found out. Mainly that Carrie is slightly unhinged, and Laura is ‘misunderstood’. Will Gav take his comments on board?

Cue the tensest rose ceremony yet, with Carrie and Laura left as the final two… Carrie looks close to breakdown, but she needn’t worry – she gets the last rose and it’s Laura that is sent home.

Poor Laura. Well, at least she’ll leave with her dignity right? Wrong. She flips Gavin the bird as she storms off the set, and leaves Gavin in no doubt that he’s made the right decision.

So, there’s just 11 girls left in the competition, and things are hotting up! Make sure you tune in on Friday for all the latest Bachelor action. Just who will win Gav’s heart?